If you are thinking about separating from your spouse or filing for divorce in North Carolina, there are some things you need to know. Here are answers to frequently asked questions about divorce:
Q: How quickly can I get divorced?
A: In North Carolina, you have to be separated a year before you can file for divorce. Once you are separated, however, you can divide your assets/liabilities and address child custody matters before actually getting divorced.
Q: Can I just pack up and leave?
A: We do not recommend doing that. It’s better to consult with an attorney before you pack up and walk out of your home. There may be serious implications to leaving. If you are in a dangerous situation or feel unsafe in your home, call 9-1-1 immediately.
Q: If my spouse wants the divorce, can they make me leave our home?
A: Generally speaking, the person who initiates the separation or divorce is the one who leaves, however, that is not always the case. It is rare that you can be forced to physically leave the marital home. In North Carolina, it takes a court order – either related to a domestic violence protective order or proof that the person being asked to leave has done something wrong (divorce from bed and board).
Q: Should I talk to my spouse or partner about separating?
A: It’s always better if you and your spouse or partner can communicate effectively and discuss matters. It may make sense for one of you to move into a spare bedroom while you work through the details of a separation and make an appointment with an attorney. If it is not realistic or possible for you to talk to your spouse about separating, you should try to speak to a divorce lawyer before taking any action.
Q: Can I post on social media about my divorce?
A: We strongly recommend you keep everything off of social media and away from nosy friends and family members. You should assume that anything you post online, send as a text, or leave in writing or as a voice mail, may end up as evidence in a courtroom. Choose a trusted friend or family member to confide in, but otherwise, do not overshare.
Q: My friend just told me a scary story about their divorce. Should I believe it?
A: Be there to support your friend, but don’t believe everything they tell you. Their situation may be totally different, or they may have misinterpreted what they heard. In short, do not take legal advice from non-lawyers!
Q: What should we tell our children?
A: Be cautious about conversations you have with children and make sure you take their emotional
needs into consideration. Children need to understand that your decision to separate or divorce is not
their fault. Nothing they did (or didn’t do) led to this decision made by you and your spouse or partner.
Children need to know that both parents still love them and will continue to put the children’s best interest first. Remember that children don’t deserve to be put in the middle of adult matters. We recommend you and your spouse come to an initial agreement related to child custody and support prior to physically separating.
To find out more about separation and divorce in North Carolina, please send us a message or call to set up a consultation with one of our family law attorneys.