by Danielle DeAngelis, Board Certified Family Law Specialist
Choosing to adopt a child is a big decision and lifelong commitment. Families choose to adopt for many reasons, including adopting a relative who has lost their parents or whose parents are unable to care for them, medical challenges that prevent pregnancy, or a wish to give a child currently in the foster care system a caring family. We also see stepparents adopting minor children or even adopting adult children to formalize the family relationship.
How do I adopt a child in North Carolina?
There are several options to adopt a child in North Carolina. Costs can vary widely based on your selection:
- You can choose to adopt a child from the state’s foster care system. Children end up in foster care for a variety of reasons. Many of these children do end up being returned to their families, but many children who are currently in foster care are available for adoption.
- You may use a national or local private adoption agency that is licensed in the state.
- Know a pregnant mother who plans to give up her baby for adoption? You might consider a private, independent adoption. In this case, you may choose to maintain contact with the birth parents so the child knows both sets of parents.
- Finally, an international adoption agency is another option. International adoption can be very complex, since it is governed by US federal law, the laws in the country where the child lives (that country must be party to the Hague Adoption Convention), and the laws in the state where you live.
What are the legal considerations when adopting a child?
- Unless the adoption is an independent adoption where the birth parents and adoptive parents know each other, adoption records in NC are generally sealed.
- Potential adopters may have to undergo a home study and be found qualified to adopt. They will look at your family situation and dynamics, finances, physical and mental health, and your motivation for adopting a child.
- The child can be placed for adoption by the agency (if one is involved), the child’s guardian (if no birth parents are involved), or the child’s birth mother and birth father.
- If an older child is being adopted (age 12+), they will be asked to give their consent to the adoption.
- Most adoptive parents using a private agency or an independent adoption choose to pay some of the birth mother’s expenses. Payment is made through a third party and not directly to the mother. You cannot legally “buy” a baby, so tracking expenses and being able to justify the amounts paid is very important.
- Should the adoption take place across state lines (within the US), it’s important to have an attorney who understands the laws in both jurisdictions.
I often recommend counseling for families looking at adopting. This helps to ensure all family members are on the same page and have realistic expectations about adding a new family member. It’s also important to talk with a family law attorney familiar with North Carolina adoptions to ensure the process is handled correctly.
Contact Brinkley Walser Stoner today to schedule an appointment with a family law attorney.